The Trip - with 4 kids

Day 1 Celebrating every win Seattle to SF via Oakland

For a long time, I have wanted to live my life with gusto - having been inspired by quotable life lessons - it doesn’t matter what happens to you, what matters is how you respond or The Graduate’s carpe diem. And for the most part I think I’ve done ok outside of occasional letting things consume me that are out of my control.

I don’t know what my point is except to recount this day and this trip - 

The backdrop: I’ve somehow managed to find myself in a blended family - I suppose somewhat inevitable following a divorce at 40 - but still - the challenges are deeper than I have considered myself able to handle. Yet here we are, potentially pleased with myself that I'm still growing and finding new levels of patience or whatever lessons this chapter of life has for me. 

The trip: 

Day 1: We started our journey with 2 kids- my oldest and youngest. Then met up with Scott’s parents at the airport where the number of kids doubled and the scale tipped on the kids: adult ratio. 

[James - I hope one day you might actually read through this and get to relive the most memorable moments. I want to make them every day with you before I can’t.]

Our day happened somewhere between a car ride, a plane ride, a car rental, an Oakland market: Prescott, and finally The Riu Hotel just around the corner from Fisherman’s Wharf San Francisco. In this whirlwind, it consisted of a pool side jaunt, a walk to 711, double queen beds, a room full of crying children and ended with everyone asleep, possibly crashed from exhaustion by 9:30pm which is early by all standards. And the time is now 10:18pm as I write this - I’m showered and ready to rest my own eyes but I want to celebrate today - how every moment was like approaching a mile marker along a marathon, crowds cheering, from leaving the house on time, to packing in the car in 80-degree temps reflected off concrete and to all those in between. We made it through our first day.

If by the end of this journey, whether a metaphor for life or a lesson to never do this again, my wealth is measured in hugs, kisses, memories full of adventures and time together doing, being, laughing, crying, consoling, growing, exploring - I think I would have found the greatest elements of living there is to be found.

Day 2: SF —- no rewrite, my refresh screen deleted my well-intentioned attempt to capture the day as I tried to write it at 4:30am on day 3 when Mason decided it would be the rare night he stayed up babbling his sweet nothings as his family laid asleep nearby. 

Day 3: SF to Monterey. Had really wanted to write but didn’t make it, and the recall is spotty at 11pm on Day 4? Or is it 5? Ok back to it after a 2-ish hour hiatus, it’s Day 5 as I reflect back on what happened here - Golden Gate Bridge Postcard Lookout - it was a sight to take in - and hanging out on a beach with the bridge as your backdrop was less than ordinary though I spent the majority of it in a van in the parking lot breastfeeding Mason so we could get on the road…now that I think of it, I am unsure why I didn’t do it on the beach where the kids were playing. Amateur move. We arrived to our spacious suite for our current family of 8 - my mom and her stepdad joined us at the hotel in SF - after some late evening traffic on highway 1. The hotel lobby was notable, the kids wondered how long we would get to enjoy the digs - one day. James voluntarily asked to hold Mason on this day and cuddled with him on his pull-out bed in the living room of the suite. It made my day. The kids’ dad successfully orchestrated dinner and pool time: he on a run to Trader Joe's with our youngest, while I wrangled the others in the pool. I had some interesting thoughts around blended families and parenthood I am hoping to explore and realize for shame - I will not be exploring said thoughts here tonight.

Day 4: Monterey to Pismo this was our ChatGPT planned trip recommend splurge. Oh man this was our beach day. The success and beauty of which was made even more lovely by Scott’s text to me [Saturday July 18, 2026]. Admiring broad white seaside cliffs, sand and crashing waves as our children found the rhythm of a loving family dynamic - I couldn’t have asked for more. Of course there were the issues of the knee, maybe how James ended up with a large room on his own (for future reference Room 144 at the Seacrest Oceanfront Hotel), and the looming need to leave early to reach our destination with as little traffic as possible. 

Day 5: Pismo to Irvine - today- wow whatever number of thoughts we have per day and choices that must be made - I felt my fair share and I had every intention of writing them down likely in my current paper and pen journal but now it’s near half past 12am and I’ve spent so much time typing the last 2 days up from my cell phone that I’ve lost most, if not all of my steam or even trace memories of said thoughts...

- James - so proud of how his confidence has allowed him to connect with family immediate and extended with loving kindness. And he really showed up with a great attitude when things didn’t seem to quite work out as planned. 

• - I want to spend more time understanding the significance of being able to witness my 96-year-old grandma (98 on paper) hold my youngest son. 

-... for the notebook if I can recall again another day.

Day 6: … excited. Will pick back up as time allows. 

Days Later: Back in Washington and hoping to get a handle on our days before it escapes us and life's grind aka the busy-ness of work outside the family takes a toll on that which is being built. I'll reflect back on the family we saw, the glimpse of shared life we got through the brief chaotic dinners and slim chats, children running amok, and side adventures to USS Midway, smore's, Oceanside and La Jolla shores sea lions/seals, the best shrimp burrito, and safe returns with fondness even as my nervous system resettles.